REFLECTIONS: What happiness is all about
In this life full of uncertainties, one must discern on how he wanted his life to be and look back at how it were from the yesteryears and make some changes if there is a need to.
Last night, i had a pretty much great phone chat with my friend Neil on the phone. And as always, there is a striking line that up to this very moment struck my innermost being. He told me or was askin me... Are you happy? and I did answer with a No and with a smile. Trying to cover up the essence of true happiness, he coined a word that describes my happiness...
superficial happiness
and why? as compared to his life, I know he is pretty much way far a reach from me because he got all his loveones still all behind him supporting him all the way, as compared to me, the youngest of sort, is all alone trying to live a life that I have envisioned myself to become, alone, grasping for a motherly and fatherly love that I longed for.
From the very beginning, Im living in vain, trying to cast all whats left with my energies to be able to show to the world what they are expecting me to be. ITs hard to live up to the expectations of others, because afterall this is my life to spare, but knowing that more or less I made them proud of what I am, my wits and hardwork, my perseverance which they have witness all throughout these trying years, made me think and as always smile formed into my lips but that smile in a moment would fade and tears will follow suit for life has been unfair to me. I have not live a life that I wanted.
Here I am now, at midnight, in front of the computer writing something out of depression. I should not write this piece that is too much of personal thing, but this is where I gain the power to play my imagination and express my emotions that has long been overdue!
Neil... thanks for being a friend, i know you are a great friend!
Ronyl . . . I know I have been your listening ear even @ 3:00 in the morning, but you just dont know that I have more depressions and problems to share, its just that I dont have the guts to do so...anyways, Im always be happy to lend an ear for you if it would mean that I am doin a favor for you.
Baby LR , thank you for the happy moment together, for being a good friend and for bringing always the smile into my lips when the memory of us together is replayed into my mind over and over again...and for sure it will be here in my heart wherever I maybe...
Josh, we may hurt each other then, but I want you to know you've been a joy to me and I will always treasure the time we were together, the happy and the bad times...all of them are chronicled in a chapter in which your character existed in my book of life.
Labs Gee... i know ive been unfair with you when I have put you in a situation that maybe awkward with you, nonetheless, i wanna thank you for being there for me still, nothings change with the friendship that we were able to established! But for sure, It was just the real me that wept to express the grievances brought about by failures which you took wholeheartedly...
and of course to my girl...thank you for being there always, for understanding my lack of time with you and for always loving me no matter what. You're such a noble girlfriend and I thank God for giving you to me! I hope we will reach our dreams and aspiration together forever!
this is your ironicguy on deep emotions
now signing off
life is simple, ironic it may seem because of the complexities it brought in.
In this life full of uncertainties, one must discern on how he wanted his life to be and look back at how it were from the yesteryears and make some changes if there is a need to.
Last night, i had a pretty much great phone chat with my friend Neil on the phone. And as always, there is a striking line that up to this very moment struck my innermost being. He told me or was askin me... Are you happy? and I did answer with a No and with a smile. Trying to cover up the essence of true happiness, he coined a word that describes my happiness...
superficial happiness
and why? as compared to his life, I know he is pretty much way far a reach from me because he got all his loveones still all behind him supporting him all the way, as compared to me, the youngest of sort, is all alone trying to live a life that I have envisioned myself to become, alone, grasping for a motherly and fatherly love that I longed for.
From the very beginning, Im living in vain, trying to cast all whats left with my energies to be able to show to the world what they are expecting me to be. ITs hard to live up to the expectations of others, because afterall this is my life to spare, but knowing that more or less I made them proud of what I am, my wits and hardwork, my perseverance which they have witness all throughout these trying years, made me think and as always smile formed into my lips but that smile in a moment would fade and tears will follow suit for life has been unfair to me. I have not live a life that I wanted.
Here I am now, at midnight, in front of the computer writing something out of depression. I should not write this piece that is too much of personal thing, but this is where I gain the power to play my imagination and express my emotions that has long been overdue!
Neil... thanks for being a friend, i know you are a great friend!
Ronyl . . . I know I have been your listening ear even @ 3:00 in the morning, but you just dont know that I have more depressions and problems to share, its just that I dont have the guts to do so...anyways, Im always be happy to lend an ear for you if it would mean that I am doin a favor for you.
Baby LR , thank you for the happy moment together, for being a good friend and for bringing always the smile into my lips when the memory of us together is replayed into my mind over and over again...and for sure it will be here in my heart wherever I maybe...
Josh, we may hurt each other then, but I want you to know you've been a joy to me and I will always treasure the time we were together, the happy and the bad times...all of them are chronicled in a chapter in which your character existed in my book of life.
Labs Gee... i know ive been unfair with you when I have put you in a situation that maybe awkward with you, nonetheless, i wanna thank you for being there for me still, nothings change with the friendship that we were able to established! But for sure, It was just the real me that wept to express the grievances brought about by failures which you took wholeheartedly...
and of course to my girl...thank you for being there always, for understanding my lack of time with you and for always loving me no matter what. You're such a noble girlfriend and I thank God for giving you to me! I hope we will reach our dreams and aspiration together forever!
this is your ironicguy on deep emotions
now signing off
life is simple, ironic it may seem because of the complexities it brought in.
posted by Ironicguy @ 1:03 AM
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